You, the Patient:
Choosing a Practitioner

Note: For purposes of convenience, I'm referring to all visits as "medical," even though some may technically not be.

The time may come in anyone's life when seeing a traditional or nontraditional medical practitioner is a wise idea. (Please note that we frequently remind readers that any advice on our website is not meant to replace a medical opinion.) As with everything else in life, attitude is everything in terms of how you approach this consultation.

Below, I explore several challenges to a useful visit.

"I'm a failure."

Jane believes that herbs, vitamins, essences, crystals, and the power of her mind can heal her of any disorder. So why didn't any of these methods work? She must have done something wrong. Is she a quitter? Why doesn't she believe in herrself? Maybe she secretly has such terrible beliefs and such deep negativity that metaphysics washes its hands of her.

She feels like a failure, and she approaches the medical visit with an attitude of guilt and resignation. A subtext can be: "Since I didn't succeed in healing myself, I might as well give my power up to the doctor/practitioner. There's no point in consulting my inner guidance; obviously I've been dialing the wrong number."

This is one way for good people to have bad medical experiences. Whether you are choosing a crystal, an essence, a massage therapist, or an M.D., you want to tune into your inner guidance. You have choices, in terms of practitioners and in what you decide to believe or not believe of the practitioner's recommendations. The more empowered you feel about your healing process, the better it will turn out.

The first step in this process is to release self-judgment. The following can help:

Pine (Bach Flower Remedy): People in the negative Pine state are rarely satisfied with anything they do, and can always find evidence that they could have done better. Guilt is the common response to this sense of imperfection.

Be glad you're not perfect. It means you're alive.

"I'm OK, but the Doctor Isn't."

Please note: I give full credit to the increasing numbers of M.D.s who listen to and respect their patients, who are open to alternative treatments, and who believe that their patients have equal rights when it comes to deciding the course of treatment. I'm not writing about them.

Sometimes the doctor isn't ok. The not ok description can also apply to any practitioner. It's easy to believe that when we select alternative or nontraditional practitioners we won't encounter authoritarianism or rigidity. Often this is the case. Alternative practitioners haven't been educated into the notion that years of training exempts them from having to act like humans. However, some practitioners have developed that notion on their own. Be alert.

Consider statements like the ones below:

Be cautious about a practitioner who tells you anything is inevitable or who gives you a death or long-term disability sentence. (S)he is radiating negative energy that hampers your current and future well-being.

I don't think you're likely to develop a healing relationship with anyone who tries to scare you-especially if they succeed. You can't improve your health from a place of fear, only from a place of hope. You want a practitioner who will encourage hope.

Be cautious about this variant on the fear-inducing pattern: "You can get better, but only if you do exactly what I say." The submessage in this is: "Ignore your inner guidance. It's wrong. I know what's best for you." This person may have "good" intentions, but he wants to run your life.

A practitioner might say something that seems to contradict information you've gathered. If you mention it, and if the practitioner says, "That's wrong, I'm right," run.

I'm not exaggerating here. I heard a story recently about a practitioner who claimed that every other practitioner, including highly respected holistic M.D.s, was wrong. Only he had the answers.

In general, if you leave a consultation feeling upset and helpless, don't go back. Your inner guidance is probably telling you that what you're hearing doesn't vibrationally match your deepest knowing.

Remember, it's your body, your life, your time and your money. Take the time to find a practitioner you can trust, one who will work with you in partnership for wellness.

Listen for these statements:

Once You're There

Finding a good practitioner gives you a good start. However, the best practitioner in the world can't override a negative mental and emotional attitude.

Some people come to a consultation in a cynical or discouraged state. They are prepared to judge this practitioner as no better than any of the zillions they've seen.

Beech (Bach Flower Remedies) helps to release prejudice and judgment of any kind. Some prejudices against medical practitioners might include: "They don't care;" "They're only interested in money;" and "They don't see their patients as people." Beech helps us see every person as an individual.

Green calcite helps to release mental fixed patterns.

Hostility may accompany judgment. You may feel angry or resentful that you're forced to see this practitioner. You may be waiting for her to give you a reason to feel hostile. This kind of receptivity often provokes the anticipated response. Holly (Bach) for anger and Willow (Bach) for resentment can be taken in preparation for a medical visit. You may also want to carry a rose quartz to remind yourself that you are the source of love.

Others are fearful. They expect to hear the worst. They remember all the bad medical stories they ever heard.

Mimulus (Bach) is helpful for known fears ("I probably have X disease"), while Aspen (Bach) helps to release unknown fears ("I don't know what it is, but it's probably awful").

Finally, establishing clear communication between you and the practitioner takes priority. You don't want to get home and wonder, "What did she mean when she said X?" or "Did she say X or Y?"

Turquoise is not only a generally powerful communication stone; it helps people to enlist others in support of their goals. You want to enlist your practitioner in your agenda for healing. Meditate with turquoise prior to your visit, and carry a piece with you.

Two FES essences may also help. Trumpet Vine helps you to clearly and powerfully communicate your needs and wants. Calendula helps you to do this in a way that invites dialogue, not a shouting match.

Articles in the Healing Series

These articles are in no particular order. Choose the one that first gets your attention.

Introduction to the Healing Series
Finding Your Peaceful Center Stress is a known cause of illness. Crystals, essences, and other tools can reduce it.
Mental-Emotional Balance: Where Healing Begins Anguish, guilt, anger, and impatience can lead to illness.
You the Healer Believe in yourself and allow the healing to happen
To Your Health: Talk to your body, and listen, too.
Thinking Our Way to Health Sometimes our beliefs get in the way of healing.
You the Patient Going to a practitioner for advice doesn't mean giving up your intuition and ability to heal yourself.
The Healing Crisis It can be a rough ride. Some suggestions for smoothing the bumps.

Bach and Other Flower Essences
Articles Library Links

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